Last night, we had an interesting conversation with some girlfriends about guilt. It turns out, we’re all over the map when it comes to this powerful emotion.
Some of us (guilty as charged) are carrying around a Catholic-sized guilt trip that would make our grandmothers proud. Our guilt game is so strong, we could win Olympic medals for it. While some of our friends have entered their 50s with a whole new attitude. Their mantra? “F*ck guilt! I’m too old for that shit!” They’re unapologetically living their best lives, guilt-free.
This conversation sparked our curiosity. Where do most women fall on this guilt spectrum? Are we alone in our guilt-ridden thoughts? Is everyone else living carefree? We couldn’t resist diving deeper.
So, we’ve channeled our inner Cosmo editors (because who doesn’t love a good Cosmo quiz?) and crafted some fun questions to discover who in our community is swimming in a sea of guilt and who’s living guilt-free.
The Ultimate Guilt Test:
It’s been a busy week and you’ve missed five calls from your mom already. When she calls again, you:
a) Pick up instantly, apologize, and silently resent the interruption
b) Let it go to voicemail, again, then spend the next hour feeling guilty
c) Answer and set a regular call schedule moving forward
d) Send a quick text suggesting a weekend catch-up
It’s your anniversary, but you’re absolutely overwhelmed right now by life’s demands. You:
a) Cancel everything to frantically prepare an elaborate surprise, feeling guilty the whole time about everything else you’re neglecting
b) Acknowledge the day with a quick “Happy Anniversary” text, promising yourself you’ll make it up later when things calm down
c) Take a long lunch with your main squeeze to celebrate, promising a proper date soon
d) Simplify your schedule to make time for a meaningful evening together
Your friend’s birthday party conflicts with your self-care plans. You:
a) Cancel your plans and go to the party, resenting it the whole time
b) Make a quick appearance then feel guilty for leaving early
c) Explain you can’t make it but plan a special lunch date instead
d) Stick to your plans knowing you’ll be a better friend when you’re recharged
When you think about taking time for yourself, you feel:
a) Guilty – there’s always something else you should be doing
b) Anxious – what if someone needs you while you’re unavailable?
c) Excited, but a little nervous about what others might think
d) Totally deserving – it’s essential for your well-being
Your house is a mess, and you’re exhausted. You:
a) Force yourself to clean, sacrificing sleep for a tidy home
b) Fret about the mess but don’t summon the energy to clean
c) Quickly straighten up, promising a deep clean on the weekend
d) Close the door and head to bed, knowing rest comes first
The Moment of Truth:
Tally up your points: each ‘a’ is worth 1 point, ‘b’ is 2 points, ‘c’ is 3 points, and ‘d’ is 4 points. Add ’em up and discover your guilt type:
Guilt Goddess (0-5 points): You’re carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders! Time to trade that guilt crown for a self-love tiara.
Remorse Rebel (6-10 points): You’re breaking free from guilt’s grip, but still sneaking glances back. Keep pushing forward – you’re on the verge of a guilt-free breakthrough.
Balanced Boundary-Setter (11-15 points): Guilt trips? Please, you’ve cracked the code on keeping guilt at bay. You’re serving ‘no’ with a side of self-care, and it looks fabulous on you.
Carefree Queen (16-20 points): ‘Guilt? Sorry, never heard of her.’ You’re too busy living your best life and inspiring everyone around you. You go, girl!
We’d love to know how you ranked. Please take a minute to hit reply and let us know your score. We’ll share the community’s overall results with you next week. Because no matter where you landed on the guilt spectrum, we’re here for you.
xoxo
Mikelle & Michelle